The Anatomy of Courage
Been avoiding something you really want to face? In my experience, courage isn’t as mystical and illusive as we’ve been taught. I hope these tips help ground the concept of courage and support you in taking practical action towards what you want.
Find ways to make it easier.
Sometimes it’s not the fear of doing something, it’s the prospect of doing it in your current state. You’re not a coward, you might be exhausted, hungry, or confused. Rest, take in sustenance or talk about what you’re going through with someone - you’ll be surprised how something huge can suddenly feel a lot more manageable.
Lower the stakes.
Make it equally acceptable (to yourself) to do the thing, or not do the thing. Unconditional self-acceptance might seem counter intuitive, but it takes the pressure off and creates a culture of support. Genuine personal development happens slowly and includes respecting the line between safety and growth. In my experience, I’m also more likely to take a risk if I know, no matter what happens, I’m loved and supported.
Deconstruct the story.
Sometimes fear comes up when I want to do something in alignment with my values, but my mind and conditioning create tension. I take this to my journal. What belief is creating this fear? Is it true? Is it what I believe in? Who I really am? The example I want to set? The change I want to see in the world?
I balance out the tension and get clear on what I value by re-enforcing why I want to do this thing in the first place. I make the core desire stronger than resistance. (This also helps me discern if, in acting in spite of fear, I’m being spontaneous or reckless.)
Be FULLY in the moment.
Fear makes us want to escape ourselves, but what if you went even deeper? One of the benefits of doing something we fear is that it alters our state of consciousness. It changes our experience of reality and time.
Think of yourself like a journalist reporting on your life and this is a learning experience you’re going to document. Get all the juicy details you can.
Feel each second tick by. Feel the sensations in your body. If you can, name them.
“Ooh my stomach is twisting”
“Ahh my mind is racing”
Celebrate the little wins
I used to test myself from a place of lack, making myself do harder and harder things, moving the goal posts further and further, all while I got more resentful and dug my feels even deeper the next time. Cultivating courage as a life-long habit means taking the time to build it on the strongest foundations — self-love and trust. Acknowledging each courageous act means I associate bravery with being grateful and proud of myself, rather than exhaustion and depletion.
Be gentle with yourself as you navigate fear and remember, being human is a courageous act. The fact you’re alive and breathing is proof of your courage.
