This is the story of the time God spoke to me on my balcony…
It was coming towards the end of a Wellbeing Day that I had to re-connect and focus my intentions after a busy couple of weeks. I had been feeling extremely connected to the Universe all day, every step I took and decision I made was filled with purpose and Divine Intention. My writing was flowing freely and with ease; it was one of those days I felt as though I had a book inside me and if I just sat at my computer and kept typing, it would present itself to me, complete. (And it probably would have if I didn’t stop, physically shut my computer, and go to the gym.) I was sitting on my balcony with a cup of tea, reading ‘A Return to Love’ in my yoga pants and feeling incredibly blessed.
At this point in my life, I was about to start my fourth and final year of my Journalism degree. I had done work experience with a magazine in Sydney, I was Deputy Editor of an online magazine for women in Business and I was a couple of weeks in to an Internship with a major network newsroom, it was safe to say that I was doing everything right to secure my spot in the field. The only problem was, it was a spot I knew I didn’t want.
For the last three years I had been bombarded with people telling me to get experience. ‘It doesn’t matter where it is, just find a way in.’ I knew I wanted to be in some form of broadcast role and I guess I figured that reporting on the news was going to be my foot in the door, but following politicians around building sites and standing outside the Brisbane courthouse just wasn’t giving me any real sense of satisfaction. I have always had an incredible respect for reporters and the service they provide, but it just wasn’t for me.
In regards to my future, I trusted in the Universe, but my plans were pretty hazy. I knew at this point I wanted to start a blog where I could share all the lessons I was learning about choosing Love over fear and encourage people to become the best version of themselves. I also knew I wanted to live in Sydney.
Brisbane, although I appreciated it’s beauty and the incredible people I had met there, had never felt like home to me. (I needed my beach walks.) With all this in the back of my head, I kept plodding along in my routine.
I figured I’d give myself twelve more months of honing my message and skills as a writer, working to save enough for the move and finishing my degree; it wasn’t exactly an appealing decision to me, but it was a safe one.
As I sat there with my cup of tea, suddenly the thought occurred to me, ‘Why don’t you just do it now?’ My Ego jumped in pretty quickly, ‘Because you’re not ready, you don’t have the financial stability, you don’t have the time, you’re too young and you don’t know the first thing about running a business.’
It was willing me to put it off for another year and then re-assess, which was obviously the logical choice. But something inside me just wouldn’t shut up. I stopped reading, closed my eyes, held the book to my chest and asked the Universe plain and simple, ‘Am I ready now?’
The response was overwhelming.
It was as if the heavens opened up in that moment. An incredible sense of purpose, excitement and uncontainable joy (the magnitude of which I still haven’t been able to replicate to this day) flooded through my entire being. A massive smile spread across my face and I actually started giggling out loud. I saw my Grandma (who had passed away two years before) and I felt God give me an unmistakable and resounding, Yes. Images flashed through my head of my Blog – not unlike the way it looks today – and me proudly sharing the link with family and friends. I saw myself standing on stage talking to hundreds and thousands of people and taking days just like this one to reflect, meditate and share the messages I was receiving with the world.
When the fear and self-doubt had washed away, I felt excited, limitless and safe. I could plainly see the beauty and light within myself and my capacity for greatness.
It was a glimpse of Heaven and of God within me.
I made the decision then and there to quit my internship and use every cent of my savings to enrol in an 8 week online business course.
Quitting my internship was seriously scary. I remember sending the email felt really similar to jumping out of a plane (which I had actually done a few weeks earlier). I had no safety net, I had no idea what I was going to do and according to some people I was throwing away the opportunity of a lifetime. But I knew I had to take that leap of faith and, as always, God would be there to give me wings.